The other day I had a very good laugh. The kind of laughter that wells up inside your cheeks and turns you into an embarassing shadow of yourself. The sort that has you behaving incoveniently; banging tables, wiping tears, gripping people's arms and producing animalistic sounds. I was stamping my feet so hard I thought my soles would wear off. I laughed hard because I made a new friend who taught me-in the most comedic way possible-the true meaning of hustling.
When it comes to hustling, you can not simply claim you're a hustler. You can not brazenly start your success story with, "back then I hustled...". First and foremost, think very clearly, have you earned the right to claim use of that word? Do you understand what it is to hustle? Is it a pronoun? Is it a verb?
The new friend I made, a self-professed expert on everything 'hustle' changed my whole perspective on this matter of social import (Im assuming it is) and like a new born being ushered into the world of accurate knowledge, I was educated and I'll pass some wisdom on.
If ever you're faced with one of two choices in the middle of town on a hot Monday afternoon, to either eat too much at the cheapest restaurant so you have adequate energy to foot home or to forego that meal and use the money for transport instead, that is a true definition of hustle.”
If you can effectively bargain and drop a shoe price from Ug Shs 90K to 25K in a matter of five minutes or less and in the decisive moment right before the salesman intones "kale sasula", you realise the extra 10k you thought you had in your pocket was spent on laundry the day before, and it's all you had but you willfully vow that your dignity will leave that street side unscathed-which it does-then my friend, you're a qualified depicter of true hustle.
To hustle is to know when to deliberately-and without suspicion-have lunch at 4.30pm. In the event that evening tea and supper are hard to afford, such wisdom should come in handy.
Hustle is what gets you braving the tropical heat and coming out a shade lighter at the end of it all. It is what has you calculating the equivalent bags of cement in a cute ensemble of cake tiers at a wedding reception.
Hustle is what has Bad Black thriving in her current situation. She made news before prison, promised to make even more news after, came out looking unrecognisable and still kept good on her promise. That is a true hustler.
But if you're the man who, at his own wedding, takes it upon himself to usher guests in and serve food, to mcee and make speeches having done away with groomsmen and bridesmaids, having picked out one of his old suits and a pair of old shoes for the ceremony, having insisted that his bride wear her one-month old pair of middle heeled shoes from kikuubo, having placed a dozen cup cakes at the central table instead of a real iced wedding cake...if you're that kind of man, you are no hustler. You are not deserving of this prestigious term of black men. What you're doing is B.S (Im censoring this word). That is no hustle and that sort of man doesn't deserve a day in heaven.
And apparently, a 5 years' experience in 'hustle' before marriage is an added advantage for the woman or man contending for the position of life long partner, for better or worse. Such experience would guarantee a wrinkle free life, happy children and happier in-laws.”
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