My Visit to the Dentist

Never let it be said that I didn’t warn you; that I kept all this wisdom in and didn’t advise you. My trip to the dentist was as harsh as they come. I thought I looked sweet and nice enough and that the dentist might forego a full blown assault on my jaws and devise some smoother way to pluck out my molar but that didn’t happen. Oh yeah, this was no routine dental check up. I’m an African who lives in Africa and going to the dentist in Africa almost always literally means plucking one's teeth out.

Ever since I discovered that I might be chewing on one too many sweets and that a tiny hole was warping its way out of my last molar, I'd been putting the whole thing off. Obviously the situation might have been contained with cementing or a much less gruesome procedure if I’d acted earlier but then again, there’s never been a pretty story about any dentist procedures. And at the risk of facing criticism from my medical school colleagues, I stalled. I seriously hoped that by some God given miracle the problem would resolve itself, and so I continued eating sweets (read a whole lot of sweets and a few Cadburys)

Eventually I had to visit the dentist anyway. One more night with that spiteful tooth and I’d die-if you know what I mean. It didn’t go well at all. I mean the tooth is out and currently I have a gaping (although painless) hole at the back of my mouth but in hindsight, I probably should’ve listened more to my pharmacology professor as he went on and on about Lidocaine. It’s possible that somewhere in there he might have mentioned the pain that comes with that injection. Still I’m thinking that nothing in this world could’ve prepared me for this. The anaesthesia was totally effective, I’ll give it that. Nevertheless it’ll take a thousand men to give me that injection again. Hands down, the most painful needle ever!

For someone who prides herself on her mental strength and the ability to avoid embarrassment at all cost, I risked my soul. I couldn’t help crying. My pride, my ego, my guts, my very being, my everything-all lost at the hands of a dentist. You know what, that’s about it. I don’t have the brains to tell any more of this mortifying tale.

The advice: Never, under any circumstance go to the dentist, even the morning after is not all sunshine and happy days. Eat your chocolates, just brush five times a day. Be happily healthy and don't give this advice to anyone.